This is a position of privilege. The major problem with it is that it's not the responsibility of the minority person to educate the person of privilege. Out of courtesy, she might link to something educational, like Yukie did to "Derailing for Dummies," but she doesn't HAVE to. It's not her responsibility. It's your responsibility as a mature person posting about a minority (particularly not your own) to do a little research and educate yourself. You might be fortunate enough to know someone who cares enough about you to explain it, but they don't HAVE to.

Another metaphor: You work in a day care. Normally you work with the big kids, but today you're in the two-year-old room. A toddler gets upset and bites you. You patiently explain that it's not nice. Twenty minutes later, another one bites you in the same spot. You're a little frustrated, but you gently tell him not to do that. By the end of the day, you've been bitten in the same spot twenty times, your hand is raw and bleeding and you just want to go home. Then, ANOTHER kid bites you, and you just haul off and smack the crap out of him. Is that fair to the individual kid? No. Is it understandable, considering the day you've had? Totally.

You start out patiently explaining to everyone your position, but after awhile you just want to smack people. Not fair, maybe not as "helpful," still understandable.