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Cause of my headache: migraine + tension headache.
I clenched my teeth in my sleep and tensed up so much that the entire left side of my face was painful.
I was worrying so much about the pain that I made it WORSE.
(Parents were unhelpful. Telling me to stop worrying is great IN THEORY... At least they got that I was honestly struggling with this.)
So Counselor did meditation work with me and it was really amazing. I can make my mind go quiet. I learned to just let thoughts pass by. Note them and let them move on. After that thre wasn't any thought except about my breathing and the quiet space in me.
I remembered my friend JB telling me that she thought my energy felt like water and that she felt 'a sort of abyss type thing but not in a bad way'. (I love JB XD) I thought about water and about just kind of drifting down like some amazing merYukie to the bottom were the bioluminescent things do their best star impressions.
I didn't know how long I was meditative until he told me. 20 freakin' minutes.
And now I am almost pain-free for the first time in DAYS and it's such a fucking relief. I can identify my pain without freaking the fuck out.
There's residual ache but I can identify and handle it.
I just needed to remember that i -do- know my bodyand REMEMBER when I do things like ask a particular bard with a knack for warding/blocking mojo to help me deal with a stuck-open Ajna that was stuck to the point that my empathy is distracting - motherfucker was closed for DAYS and I only realized last night that it was...he forgot too, so it's dual derpage and anyway it's back open now... and that I'm better at relaxing than I think I am.
Also apparently I'm a projective empath. XD; I know that Counselor is observant but he says that as soon as I walked in he knew I was stressed out of my gourd. So - yeah. XD; I am a LEETLE BEACON.
Anyhow.
Man. It is SUCH a bloody relief. I feel so much better it's not funny.
I clenched my teeth in my sleep and tensed up so much that the entire left side of my face was painful.
I was worrying so much about the pain that I made it WORSE.
(Parents were unhelpful. Telling me to stop worrying is great IN THEORY... At least they got that I was honestly struggling with this.)
So Counselor did meditation work with me and it was really amazing. I can make my mind go quiet. I learned to just let thoughts pass by. Note them and let them move on. After that thre wasn't any thought except about my breathing and the quiet space in me.
I remembered my friend JB telling me that she thought my energy felt like water and that she felt 'a sort of abyss type thing but not in a bad way'. (I love JB XD) I thought about water and about just kind of drifting down like some amazing merYukie to the bottom were the bioluminescent things do their best star impressions.
I didn't know how long I was meditative until he told me. 20 freakin' minutes.
And now I am almost pain-free for the first time in DAYS and it's such a fucking relief. I can identify my pain without freaking the fuck out.
There's residual ache but I can identify and handle it.
I just needed to remember that i -do- know my body
Also apparently I'm a projective empath. XD; I know that Counselor is observant but he says that as soon as I walked in he knew I was stressed out of my gourd. So - yeah. XD; I am a LEETLE BEACON.
Anyhow.
Man. It is SUCH a bloody relief. I feel so much better it's not funny.
no subject
Date: 2010-04-14 06:07 am (UTC)And...okay I don't know what to think of this, or if it means anything at all but. I've had inexplicable headaches in the exact same spot the last couple of days, and now they're gone.
*doodedoodoodedoodoo~*
Also T is full of derp and Aurora will try to poke him more when he forgets things. He's rather, uh, spoony at times.
no subject
Date: 2010-04-14 12:53 pm (UTC)And - wow. Well. I apparently do the projecting empathy thing XD; So maybe that's it. But DAMN it was like the left side of my face and neck was like this half-mask of sore muscles and stiff and OW. If I was like, beaming thigs I am sorry XD;;;
*BUM BUM BAAAAAHHHHH... SQUEEDLEDEEEE!!!*
(I totally stole that onomatopoeia off Cakewrecks XD)
AND YES oh my LORD I mean even when he was batshit nucking futs and had no fewer than seven magnificent-bastard plots percolating on back burners at any given time? AIRHEAD. Spoony inDEED. Xav must have gone NUTS like 'dad. dad. dad. DAD. DAD stop looking at the birds and FOCUS' XD I mean - I don't know XD;;; He confuses me a lot. But he's not bad company. Even if occasionally he has the nurfurdehur.